Eggs
Eggs are the spawn of the devil. They are our nemesis, and the Egg Haters Club is sworn to protect the world against them. Reasons Why Eggs are Evil * They are slimy. * They come out of the wrong end of a chicken. * They smell like sulfurous farts. * Male baby chicks are killed because they can't lay eggs. * They are meant for containing chicken embryos and yet people eat them. * They taste wrong * They are called Sunny Side Ups. Does this mean Sunny, our beloved SandWing Dragonet of Destiny, is cruelly served side up for scavenger consumption? Ew, no. * Chickens are domesticated, ripped from the wild, put in cramped, smelly, sad excuses for houses just for eggs. * They have a creepy shape no matter what hideous form they have taken. * They have taken over the good nation of Breakfast and enslaved it to their will. * They break TOO easily and the slimy yolk spills EVERYWHERE. * They are literally like empty uteruses that are meant to contain embryos. * Connected to the 'cramped quarters' reason, hens put in these houses usually die of disease/infection due to inhumane conditions. Furthermore, corpses are often not removed, forcing remaining chickens to watch as it rots. * 28% of people are lactose-intolerant because they saw an egg on the first day of their life... EVIL PARENTZ Types of Eggs Know the enemy. * Boiled Eggs: The most basic form of these demons, apart from raw eggs. They can be identified by their smell, which resembles a dog's fart. Subspecies include Hard Boiled and the worst, Soft Boiled. * Century Eggs: One of the most evil forms of eggs. They resemble eggs that have rotted for fifty years and have turned into zombies. If you ever find yourself within 10 miles of one, RUN FOR YOUR LIFE. * Scrambled Eggs: One of the most common and disgusting. Its like eating an egg's internal organs. * Balut: Another one of the absolute worst forms of egg. It is a cooked duck egg with a freaking developing embryo inside it. * Omelettes: A close cousin of Scrambled Eggs, omelettes take your favorite foods, wrap it in its yellow, disgusting grasp. It lacks egg white, but that doesn't make it any better. * Frittatas: A close relative of the Omelette. Instead of wrapping it, it serves as the base, contaminating your favorite food with its disgusting-ness. * Sunny Side Up: Just, no. The second basic form of these demons, the yolk is runny and facing up, looking like a morning sun, hence the name Sunny Side Up. WHY. Also, these are sometimes not cooked enough and can give you salmonella. * Poached: Basically like boiled eggs but without their protective shell. The white would be thoroughly cooked and the yolk warm and runny. Ew. Warm yolk is disgusting. * Baked: They invade your food. A baked egg is an egg cracked and baked into the dish. Considering the state of our poor BreakfastWings right now, I'm not surprised if the Egg Army used Baked Eggs to enslave them most. * Raw: The pure, undiluted form of these demons. Basically a chalky pod with alien snot inside of it. Can give you salmonella if eaten. * Deviled Eggs: A disgusting boiled egg trying to disguise itself with spices. The name is just as evil as the "food" itself. * Egg Drop Soup - They took good takeout soup and put shredded egg in it. Disturbing. Gallery WARNING: Wear protective eyewear when viewing this section. Get your airsickness bag ready. Wear a mask. Evil.jpeg Demons.jpeg EggEvil.png Rotten.jpeg Fluffy?! MOIST?! Aaauuugh why?!.jpeg Monster in the making.jpeg Why.jpeg It's ruined.jpeg|A perfectly good CakeWing in the process of being ruined by egg demons. egg-drop-soup-looks-so-gross.jpg|Egg drop soup. Looks like writhing maggots. Category:Characters Category:Eggs Category:Evil Devils Category:Antagonists